Girlfriend vs The Girl-friend

"The only thing to fear is fear itself"-Franklin D. Roosevelt

Have you ever wanted to say something awesomely creative that would stick with people and make them think youre a genuis? Yeah, me too. I've been working on something along the lines of if theres a space between girl and friend, keep your space-something like that. It's kinda lame but you know, whatever; its a work in progress. Speaking of which, I'm kind of a veteran on what the hyphen means between girl and friend. I've had plenty of girl-friends and plenty of girlfriends. I've also lived with both kinds.

The girl-friend is someone you are close to but have never put your you know what in her holiest of holies. I lived with my girl-friend last year and let me tell you, I learned alot. Before we moved in, we would talk about our girlfriends and boyfriends, respectively, and problems we were having. At the time, she hated my girlfriend and I hated her douchebag boyfriend. She would constantly ask me when I was breaking up with my girlfriend cause she was wrong for me. I would lie to her and be like, 'soon. real soon'. But her boyfriend told her he didn't want her hanging out with me. All because I told her mom that I wasn't her boyfriend and it was 'that guy' *in a pointing gesture). This douche bag was such a loser. I hated that guy. But I digress.. my girl-friend was believed by many to be my girlfriend cause we spent so much time together but that wasn't true. The hyphen gave me a free pass to ask as much about women as I wanted without a disapproving look.

The point of a girl-friend is to learn as much as you can about women. Trust me on that one. Dudes would insult me like, 'are u hittin that?' and I would be lik 'no, shes just a friend'. Most people didn't understand, I guess. But by not sleeping with her, ever, I could ask her questions about what she liked and it wasn't awkward cause of our non-history. It was great. The only problem with a girl-friend though is the girlfriend, no hyphen.

The girlfriend is pretty self explanatory. People have been having girlfriends since before marriage was instituted. But the girlfriend hates the girl-friend because of the undisclosed closeness the girlfriend will never receive. I have a girlfriend now that I live with but I don't think I could ever ask her some of the questions I asked my girl-friend last year. Not like my girlfriend isn't awesome, but since we are sleeping together on a pretty much nightly basis I can't ask her certain stuff. Does that sound weird? Saying it out loud makes it sound weird.

Most men treat women like sport, so let me explain it like this: the girl-friend is training camp. Her sole purpose is to see your strengths and weaknesses. You can test your young rookies and bench players or test the soreness on your veterans. Its a great learning experience that will help you in the regular season. The girlfriend is the regular season. The one you try hard with. If you have a great start, youre going to go deep into the playoffs but if you have a rocky start, youre going to be a bubble team. Bubble teams are struggling teams that at the end of the season have to put it all on the line just to reach the playoffs. Some teams make it, most teams don't. An example of bubble teams are last years Toronto Raptors and Chicago Bulls. Both teams had tying records with 4 games left in the season, including one against each other. The Bulls went 3-1 and the Raptors went 1-3.  Guess who won the last playoff spot?

The playoffs are engagement. You worked hard all season to get here and its win or go home. You're not in the clear yet and it only gets tougher from here on in...

This analogy is going way too long, but you get the point, right? The girl-friend is preseason and the girlfriend is the regular season. Guess which one matters more? That's right, neither one of them do. Without the preseason you would never have a good regular season because you never learned your strengths and weaknesses in training camp. Without the regular season, the preseason is just a waste of time.

So you need both in your life. One comes before the other but they both help each other. And a special shout out to my best friend who now lives in Italy and my girlfriend who now lives with me. I love both of you.
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*Does anybody know what time it is?*